I can't sleep

I can't sleep because I am horny as fuck. 
My head is chaos with so many thoughts of you and I together...
but you've hurt me brutally...
but...

I am pinned into a wooden fence and the weight of your body keeps me willingly balanced on a precarious step. My legs are spread wide and your hand discovers there is no underwear up my skirt, just my nakedness...Voices ring out from the house just ten feet away, light spills out from around the corner where the patio and friends mingle.
I am warm from the tequila, cigarettes, and your body heat.

...I have to roll over, I have to get down with myself at least as so many memories are driving me crazy with wanting you...but I'm supposed to think nothing of you now...I'm supposed to recall nothing more than how you've fucked around so carelessly with my heart...
but...

There are so many people moving through the crowd is like trying to squeeze that last forsaken bit of toothpaste from the tube. You hold my hand and lead as I follow diligently and trustingly. You will take care of me. The music creates this intoxicating environment when combined with alcohol consumption--it is easy to lose track of yourself, to melt into the music and the crowd.
You lead me out into the hall, up flight after flight of stairs. We stop every so often, usually by way of one or the other pinning the opposite against the wall and we make out fiendishly. I can't get enough of you.

...two weeks ago how I laid my heart out, told you I still want to be with you, and you never responded.
...person after person in my life telling me he's not treating me properly, he's messing with me...
how much I've been hurting for six weeks as you've failed time and time again to tell me anything remotely conclusive about your feelings towards me, how you've led me on only to pull away again hurting me that much more...
...how you've hurt me, you've hurt me, you've...
I come for a third time and finally my exhaustion quiets the memories in my head so maybe I can go to sleep.